Coach John Wooden Shares The Importance of Family Virtues

Posted on January 3, 2012 by admin

John Wooden Coach of UCLA Bruins 10 NCAA Championships in 12 seasons

John Wooden was one of the greatest collegiate basketball coaches in history.  He led the UCLA Bruins to 10 NCAA championships in 12 years.  John is regarded as a great leader who lived a life guided by timeless wisdom. In all the success that he achieved he never forgot where he came from.  John’s father was a man who recognized the value of living as an example and investing in the instruction of life’s virtues to his son.

John’s father, Joshua Wooden, wrote down a “creed” for John to seek to live to.  A creed is a formal statement of beliefs.  Joshua Wooden recognized the value of putting the beliefs you hold dear to writing and passed them on to John in the form of a simple list on a piece of paper titled “Seven Things To Do”.  This creed was a standard to live to and provided a foundation to guide and ground John’s life.

  1. Be true to yourself.
  2. Help others.
  3. Make each day your masterpiece.
  4. Drink deeply from good books, especially the Bible.
  5. Make friendship a fine art.
  6. Build a shelter against a rainy day.
  7. Pray for guidance and count and give thanks for your blessings every day.

The culture we live seeks to capture our hearts and is sure to provide an ever changing standard of what we should believe in.  As parents it is our responsibility to pass on the virtues that we hold dear to our children.  It is not the responsibility of the school, culture, or even the church.  This is squarely the responsibility of the parents and particularly the responsibility of the father if possible.  Before The Harvard Business Review highlighted a common characteristic of top performing lasting great companies as those that put to writing and followed a set of core values there were families who led by example and made it a priority to pass on their virtues to their children.

Take the time to think about the values that you hold dear and wish to provide as a legacy to your children.  Write them down.  Seek to model and live up to the standards that you set and teach them to your children.  Even if your children are grown it is never too late to share what you have learned and wish for them to know.

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Giving the Perfect Christmas Gift

Posted on December 14, 2011 by admin

Giving the Perfect Christmas Gift

I am writing to the husbands and fathers who, like me, find it easy to let our wives shop for the kids Christmas gifts and are quick to pick up a gift card or buy off the list provided for our wives.  There have been too many Christmas mornings that I am just as surprised as the kids to see what Dad got them for Christmas.  While this may be the path of least resistance and an easy way to check Christmas gifts off the list, we are the ones who miss out the most.  We are the ones who miss out on the joy of watching those we love the most receive a gift.  We are the one that miss planning and searching for that unique gift that expresses our love and allows us to experience the true joy of giving.

So, how do you find that “perfect gift”?  I will steal a line from my Pastor that describes
the perfect gift as one that.

  1. Meets the need of the one who receives the gift.
  2. Expresses the personality of the one who gives the gift.

How many of you have had their father ask for a shirt or tie?  I contend that almost anything that I can think of is more fun than giving my dad a tie.  A great gift is also a gift that the person would not buy for themselves.  Over the years I have enjoyed giving my mother and father a balloon ride, my wife a wetsuit, going to the skate shop after Christmas with my son to build a skateboard and buying a matching one for me so I can enjoy my second childhood at the local skatepark with him.  Since it is before Christmas I don’t want to spoil the gift I have for my daughter this year, but I am very excited to see the finished product and can’t wait for her to receive it and my love for her.

Don’t miss the opportunity to make a memorable Christmas for you and for the ones you love.  Don’t miss the chance to receive the joy of giving.  Don’t miss the chance to express your personality and meet a need of the one you love.  So, go ahead think of something special they would not buy for themselves and splurge on a fun gift.

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Year End Giving

Posted on November 27, 2011 by admin

2 Corinthians 9:7 Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

As we approach the year end it is a good time to make sure that we have completed our commitments and considered opportunities to make a difference.  In prior years we have not included our kids in our decision and feel that we have missed out on teaching and modeling giving.  There are several considerations in making a gift.

1.  Prioritize the church where you attend as number 1 and complete your tithe first.

  1. 2.  Find a charity that you connect with personally. It may be a ministry that impacted you or an experience with a hospital, education institution or other mission that you are excited to support.

3.  Support charities that have a record of good financial stewardship with the gift.  Most charities will publish their overhead expenses as a percentage of total contributions.  Generally look for those whose overhead expenses are less than 20% or >80% goes directly to the specific mission of the charity.  You can find Top Rated Charities at The American Institute of Philanthropy http://www.charitywatch.org/toprated.html

4.  Compliment your financial giving with the gift of your time.  Direct involvement keeps the connection and allows you to directly experience the results of your financial giving.

5.  Involve your children early so that they get to see giving modeled, but also participate in the joy of giving

This year we are considering Compassion International.  www.compassion.com  This afternoon we watched the video as a family and let each of our children review the pictures of other kids in need.  My middle son found one 3 year old in Haiti that he decided that he would like to sponsor.  I am excited to participate with him and encourage him to write and follow this child as he grows.  We have also supported Christian Family camps where we have attended as Christian camping was very influential in my life.  As a Rotarian, I also have enjoyed the connection with supporting Rotary International.  There are thousands of fantastic ministries and charitable causes that we can support.  As you seek to lead your family in a legacy of giving involve the whole family, check out the financial accountability, follow your heart, and compliment your financial giving with your time.

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Family Thanksgiving Activity

Posted on November 20, 2011 by admin

Ephesians 3:14 - 19

Next week is Thanksgiving and I thought I would share an activity that you and your family can share over the holiday.  This was provided in the bulletin of our church this Sunday and I thought other families may enjoy.

On Thanksgiving Day…

As you gather around the table with friends and family, spend a few moments focused on your blessings and express your gratitude to God for them.

Read: 

Ephesians 5:20 “…always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father.”

Philippians 4:6-8 “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.”

Share:

Share a couple of things you are grateful for this Thanksgiving.

Pray:

“Dear God, we thank You for Your many blessings this year – for our family, our friends and Your provision.  We set aside this day, especially, to give thanks to You.  In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.”

May you and your family know and experience the great love that God has for you this holiday! – Jeff

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Be Careful Little Eyes What You See…Truth Is True No Matter Your Age

Posted on November 13, 2011 by admin

Proverbs 4:23 Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it

As parents we seek to protect the innocence of our children, but what actions are you taking to protect your eyes, your ears, your mind, and your heart?  When we think we are above temptation is when we are the most vulnerable.  Take a moment to read this

familiar nursery rhyme  Think about your responsibility to protect your children.  Think about the greater responsibility you have to protect your own heart and mind from being captured by what the world seeks to entice you with through your eyes, ears, hands, and feet.

Oh, be careful little ears, what you hear (repeat)
For the Father Up above,
Is looking down in love,
So be careful little ears
what you hear.

(VS 2) Oh, be careful little eyes, what you see, (repeat)
For the Father up above,
is looking down in love,
So be careful little eyes
What you see.

(VS 3) Oh, be careful little mouth, what you say, (repeat),
For the Father up above,
Is looking down in love,
So be careful little
mouth what you say.

(VS 4) Oh, be careful little hands, what you do (repeat),
For the Father up above,
Is looking down in love,
So be careful little hands
What you do

(VS 5) Oh, be careful little feet where you go (repeat)
For the Father up above,
Is looking down in love,
So be careful little feet,
Where you go.

(VS 6) Oh, be careful little mind what you think (repeat)
For the Father up above,
Is looking down in love,
So be careful little mind,
What you think.

(VS 7) Oh, be careful little heart what you love (repeat)
For the Father up above,
Is looking down in love,
So be careful little heart,
What you love.

Truth is true no matter your age.  Watch this video by Casting Crowns.

Colossians 2:8  See to it that no one takes you captive through philosophy and empty deception, according to the tradition of men, according to the elementary principles of the world, rather than according to Christ.” 

Colossians 3:2 “Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth.”

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Parents: The Goal of Our Instruction is Love

Posted on November 6, 2011 by admin

I Timothy 1:5 "the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith."

As your Dad or Mom…

I can share with you life, but I cannot live it for you.

I can teach you things, but I cannot make you learn.

I can give you directions, but I cannot always be there to lead you.

I can allow you freedom, but I cannot account for it.

I can take you to church, but I cannot make you believe.

I can teach you right from wrong, but I cannot always decide for you.

I can buy you nice clothes, but I cannot make you lovely inside.

I can offer you advice, but I cannot accept it for you.

I can give you love, but I cannot force it upon you.

I can teach you to be a friend, but I cannot make you one.

I can teach you to share, but I cannot make you unselfish.

I can teach you to respect, but I cannot force you to honor.

I can advise you about friends, but I cannot choose them for you.

I can teach you about sex, but I cannot keep you pure.

I can tell you about the facts of life, but I cannot build your reputation.

I can tell you about drinking and drugs, but I cannot say no for you.

I can tell you about lofty goals, but I cannot achieve them for you.

I can let you work, but I cannot make you responsible.

I can teach you to obey, but I cannot answer for your actions.

I can teach you kindness, but I cannot force you to be gracious.

I can warn you about sins, but I cannot make your morals.

I can love you as my child, but I cannot place you in God’s family.

I can pray for you, but I cannot make you walk with God.

I can teach you about Jesus, but I cannot make Him your Savior.

I can show you faith, but I cannot make you trust in Christ.

I can teach you about prayer, but I cannot make you pray.

I can tell you how to live, but I cannot give you Eternal Life.

I can, and will, love you…forever.

When we have done our best to give instruction in the lives of our kids or in our workplace and it is time to let them go and make independent choices,  I love the simple assurance of Paul to his disciple Timothy as he goes out into a world of false teaching and confusion.  Paul’s instruction to Timothy simply says that the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.  We teach, model, instruct, correct and send.  Remember the most important thing is love and pray that the Holy Spirit will move to reveal truth.

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Community Service: Learn New Skills, Help Neighbors, Build Character

Posted on October 30, 2011 by admin

Teaching Skills, Serving the Community, Building Character

I received an email from a friend this week looking for a hand with helping a local Houston church in need of repairs to maintain insurance coverage.  I extended the invitation to my family and to those at my company and we had 18 show up Saturday morning.

We invested 4 hours at Johnson Chapel in Northeast Houston and gained a memory for a lifetime.  We created memories of service to the community, a memory of learning about construction and repairs, and a memory of working together.  To be honest none of us were looking forward to getting up early Saturday morning for a service project.  My two sons have little to no construction experience and were anxious about their lack of ability to contribute.  My sons had the opportunity to work shoulder to shoulder with other men and learn to use
tools to pull nails, cut out rotten wood, replace wooden siding, how to use a nail gun, and how to caulk joints.  Tearing out the rotten wood opened up the structure of the building and allowed them to get a first hand view of how to build a building.

Dads, we work hard during the week and find it so easy to pass up service opportunities when an extra hour of sleep is so valuable.  Dads, it is our job to lead the charge to build character into our kids.  Character to get up early in the morning when everything is crying out for more sleep.  Character to say yes to invitations for service so that it is not just a one-time event, but building a pattern and priority of service.  Character to work side by side by other men and learn new skills, and character to work hard and expect nothing in return.

The best way to build the right stuff into your kids is to get out there and do it with them.  When we got home my younger son, Ben, told my wife it was not as bad as he was
expecting and actually enjoyed doing the work and felt valued because he could
fit in the tight spots the men could not get into.  My other son Drew was tasked to take some photos and create a video.  Check it out.  Remember the words of Christ.

Luke 12:48 “…From everyone who has been given much, much will be required…”

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Are You Crazy? Francis Chan Challenges Us to Eternal Thinking

Posted on October 27, 2011 by admin

I enjoy reading books that make you think deeply and question what you really believe.  I am currently reading Francis Chan’s Crazy Love.  I thought I would simply restate some of his words that have challenged me in my busy little world.

If one person “wastes” away his day by spending hours connecting with God, and the other person believes he is too busy or has better things to do than worship the Creator and Sustainer, who is the crazy one? – p 136 Crazy Love

How much of your time is dedicated to pursuing your life and your goals, and how much is focuesed on God’s work and purposes? – p 145 Crazy Love

Joy is something that we have to choose and then work for.  Like the ability to run for an hour, it doesn’t come automatically.  It needs cultivation – p 146 Crazy Love

When I returned from my first trip to Africa, I felt very strongly that we were to sell our house and move into something smaller, in order to give more away.  The feedback I got was along the lines of “It’s not fair to your kids,” “It’s not a prudent financial choice,” and “You are doing it just for show.”  I do not remember a single person who encouraged me to explore it or supported the decision at the time.  We ended up moving into a house half the size of our previous home, and we haven’t regretted it.  My response to the cynics, in the context of eternity, was, am I the crazy one for selling my house?  Or are you for not giving more, serving more, being with your Creator more? – p 136 Crazy Love

Do you want to see God more than you desire security – p 113 Crazy Love

We like finding refuge in what we already have rather than in what we hope God will provide. – p 123 Crazy Love

The critical question for our generation – and for every generation-is this:  If you could have heaven, with no sickness, and with all the friends you ever had on earth, and all the food you ever liked, and all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed, and all the natural beauties you ever saw, all the physical pleasures you ever tasted, and no human conflict or any natural disasters, could you be satisfied with heaven, if Christ was not there? – p 100 Crazy Love quoting one of my most favorite authors John Piper

Chew on these quotes and savor the flavor of the depth of their meaning and seek to comprehend the depth of these quotes and questions.  Does it challenge you?  Does it inspire you?  Does it depress you?  It does that and more for me.

As parents and leaders in our families, businesses, communities and churches I challenge you to always have a book that you are reading to inspire you, to think deeper, to go further, to appreciate and love God more, to know and to appreciate the love God has for you, and to challenge the way we live every moment of every day that God has blessed us with.

Ephesians 3:16 – 19 “that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God.” – Amen

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Christians Celebrate the of Feast of Tabernacles

Posted on October 16, 2011 by admin

Leviticus 23:39-43

Did you know that it has always been the desire of God’s heart to dwell in the midst of His people?

As God led the children of Israel out from Egypt into the wilderness where He cared for their every need, He instructed Moses to build Him a Tabernacle where He could live in the middle of their campground.

In later years, He instructed David to build Him a dwelling place in Jerusalem as a house of worship of Him.  David’s son, Solomon, built a glorious Temple where His Divine Presence dwelt in their midst.

About 1000 years later, as the Christmas story tells us in John, the Word became flesh and dwell-ed or tabernacled among us.  Jesus, the Word of God, took on human flesh and lived on earth with His people.  Before Jesus was crucified, resurrected from the dead and ascended into heaven, He told His followers that He would never leave them nor forsake them, but would send His Holy Spirit to live within the heart of every believer.

So, as Christians, we celebrate the Feast of Tabernacles to look back to when God dwelled in the wilderness camp, to when His shekinah glory filled the Temple, and to when He lived in the flesh among us in Jesus.

We celebrate His living within the heart of every believer through the Holy Spirit today, and we look forward to the time when He will come again to set up His kingdom here on earth as our Messiah, our King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

God commanded His people to celebrate 7 feasts during the year.  The word for feast is “mikrah” which means dress rehearsal.  As we celebrate our dress rehearsal tonight, we are giving witness to the joy that is within us, because He is dwelling within us today, and we look forward to His coming again soon.

Guest blogger – Carla Applegate (Mom)

Leviticus 23: 39-43  39 “‘So beginning with the fifteenth day of the seventh month, after you have gathered the crops of the land, celebrate the festival to the LORD for seven days; the first day is a day of sabbath rest, and the eighth day also is a day of sabbath rest. 40 On the first day you are to take branches from luxuriant trees—from palms, willows and other leafy trees—and rejoice before the LORD your God for seven days. 41 Celebrate this as a festival to the LORD for seven days each year. This is to be a lasting ordinance for the generations to come; celebrate it in the seventh month. 42 Live in temporary shelters for seven days: All native-born Israelites are to live in such shelters 43 so your descendants will know that I had the Israelites live in temporary shelters when I brought them out of Egypt. I am the LORD your God.’”

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Intentionally Preparing Your Children and Those You Lead for Difficult Times

Posted on October 8, 2011 by admin

Colt McCoy Rose Bowl Interview

We had the opportunity this week to hear Brad McCoy speak at a charity fund raising dinner.  Brad is the father of the former University of Texas quarterback Colt McCoy who led his team to the national championship Rose Bowl game in 2010.  During the game Colt was injured and unable to return to fulfill his dream of wining the National Championship game.  In the locker room while realizing his injured shoulder was not going to allow him to return to lead his team Colt told his dad that he “had them“.  He knew what they were going to do before they would do it and was on his way to winning the game.  And then it happened, his dream and his ability to lead his team to victory was over.  How do you prepare your son or daughter for these moments?

As a high school football coach and father of 3 boys Brad had trained many young men and watched many parents in their efforts to prepare a smooth path for their children.  He also saw these same children blow up and make tragic choices when circumstances and life presented them with bumps in the path.  Brad and his wife Debra have made it their goal to:

“Prepare the child for the path, not the path for the child” – Brad McCoy. 

Brad and Debra were intentional in finding daily teachable moments to prepare their boys for the path that life would bring.  The cumulative result of these teachable moments prepared Colt for this courageous and God glorifying statment in the most difficult and disappointing moment in his life.

In our home life raising our kids or in our business life leading and managing our companies, being intentional and spotting teachable moments to coach your family and co-workers requires discipline.  It requires discipline to prepare your mind to think higher thoughts, see through others eyes, hear through others ears, and have the spirit to speak the right words and wise counsel that the moment requires.  As a mom, dad or manager you must prepare yourself for these moments.  I am writing to suggest a few things to do to put yourself in a position to recognize and take advantage of these teachable moments.

  1. Give yourself some margin  – You must have time in your day to refuel and gain perspective.  This is impossible if you run too hard and have no down time.  Carve out some time daily, weekly, or quarterly as is right for you to step away reflect and recharge.
  2. Be disciplined to fill yourself with knowledge, wisdom and ideas –  Give yourself the advantage of learning from others.  Read books, listen to speakers, go to seminars and fill yourself with the knowledge and wisdom learned from others so that you are prepared and have the tools in the moment.
  3. Spend time with those you wish to develop – You have to earn the right to be heard.  This comes with knowing the life, circumstances and gaining the trust of the person you are developing
  4. Pray – Earnestly seek wisdom and pray that God would open your eyes to be sensitive to the moment.  Pray that you would see with God’s eyes, hear with God’s ears, and be filled with God’s spirit to have the right words to say or when silence and a reassuring hug is best.
  5. Love – In all you do to develop and lead do in love.  When words are not enough or when there are no words to say love will cover all.

It is my prayer that you will lead your family and your organization with love.  In many ways we prepare a smooth path, but we also must be disciplined to prepare ourselves, our families, and our organizations we lead for the rough patches that surely come in our path.

I Thessalonians 4:6 – Let your speech always be with grace, as though seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person.

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